Saturday, October 17, 2009
♥ Blamed
I'm feeling really bad now...
I wanna cry out loud.. I really tired of everything..
I'm the one to be blamed..
I'm the one who cause his losing his friends and stuffs..
I'm the one making him poor..
I'm the one making him feel so lifeless...
Why do I exist in this world since I feel that I'm so extra no matter what.
My heart really pain.
I had enough of this.
I wanna run away!
Anyway to change my miserable life to a better life?
Or just exterminate me from the world will do.
It seems like my existence only makes people suffer..
I can take pain no more.
Is this place really not suitable for me at all?
Why I still can't jump out from the box from last time?
I'm really useless..
I only know how to ruin things in people's life.
Like today, I'm the one to be blamed.
To make a birthday girl upset.
If I do not exist in the first place, no one will upset.
I thought tonight will be an enjoyable night but it ends up differently..
It makes all people around me sad.
I used 1 hour to make up and stuffs so that I can enjoy my night happily.
It didn't last. By the time I reached Cine, I started to feel bad.
We end up never eat dinner. We end up going home separately.
I end up blogging here and just can't stop crying while he ran to her to borrow a listening ears.
Where is my listening ears then?
Told Andrea the incident but I still not feeling good.
The moment they went off for their own dinner and we stayed behind.
I feel like I ruined everything.
He actually planned to take care of my boredom and loneliness for the day but end up nothing.
It didn't help but ruined everything.
I it really my fault? I really don't have friends in Singapore.
Who can I rely to?
JiinJiin
I wanna cry out loud.. I really tired of everything..
I'm the one to be blamed..
I'm the one who cause his losing his friends and stuffs..
I'm the one making him poor..
I'm the one making him feel so lifeless...
Why do I exist in this world since I feel that I'm so extra no matter what.
My heart really pain.
I had enough of this.
I wanna run away!
Anyway to change my miserable life to a better life?
Or just exterminate me from the world will do.
It seems like my existence only makes people suffer..
I can take pain no more.
Is this place really not suitable for me at all?
Why I still can't jump out from the box from last time?
I'm really useless..
I only know how to ruin things in people's life.
Like today, I'm the one to be blamed.
To make a birthday girl upset.
If I do not exist in the first place, no one will upset.
I thought tonight will be an enjoyable night but it ends up differently..
It makes all people around me sad.
I used 1 hour to make up and stuffs so that I can enjoy my night happily.
It didn't last. By the time I reached Cine, I started to feel bad.
We end up never eat dinner. We end up going home separately.
I end up blogging here and just can't stop crying while he ran to her to borrow a listening ears.
Where is my listening ears then?
Told Andrea the incident but I still not feeling good.
The moment they went off for their own dinner and we stayed behind.
I feel like I ruined everything.
He actually planned to take care of my boredom and loneliness for the day but end up nothing.
It didn't help but ruined everything.
I it really my fault? I really don't have friends in Singapore.
Who can I rely to?
JiinJiin
8:59 PM
